Okay, enough useless babbling
Let's talk about something that is very common in our life, which is something called friendship. So okay, what's the deal with me to suddenly talk about friendship whereas I'm so far away from any, even though I had realized from before that a friendship is sometime more fragile when people are separated far away, pretty much like the lover's logic
Thing is, in the Facebook, suddenly last night people were suddenly philosophizing about friendship, all of a sudden. And not just one, two, or three people, but yeah, more than that that it got me thinking, why, isn't it the holiday or something, things that just don't matter. And I thought that so okay, let them be, I won't have a say because I'm just not smart and intelligent enough to join discussion, plus I don't have any recent accident to relate myself into
Later after midnight, I found that is to be a bit farfetched, as I, myself, like all those people, are having my friendship and belief being tested by fate
An old friend of mine, from high school, which I haven't met since after our SPM examination, commented something on one of my status. That one comment really pissed me off, and my mood was spoilt, that rotten temper of mine has gotten control of me once again. I was like, how dare he said that after we haven't seen each other for such a long long time
At first, I thought of just deleting him from my friends' list. However, I retaliated back by putting up a status to just leave me alone, and he gave another comment, showing that aggressiveness still, yet seemed to be like really lost. I was up to another bashing, like a true cowardly keyboard warrior would...
Until I had realized that, I'm being controlled by my anger, and because of that, I'm going to lose another friend because of it...
It hurts so much before, no way I'm going to let it happen again. I had, somehow, ignore this ego that dwells inside of me, and asked of him, just what the hell is wrong, and as weird as it feels to say sorry first, I did to him. And only then, he said sorry to me, and explained that he was just sleep-deprived and can't think straight because he will have his final exam next week. Things was settled then, and we remained friends still
For even a small matter, our friendship was nearly broken in half. All the good and bad memories for that two precious years, all the goofing off in the bath hall, forming a study group together, playing basketball every evening during riadah time and every weekends right after Subuh prayers... I'm just glad, that we both can still cherish that memories and not look back in anger...
What is friendship, or rather, what is a, friend? One might ask, what is a friend? Just for a companion when in happier times? Some might say that to never trust 100% a friend, because they only use you for their own benefits, whether intentionally, or unintentionally. There are even people that even go to the length of saying that the notion of friendship is a lie, it is just a social play used to control the society. Whatever
As for me, I don't have the answer myself. I had lived for more than 19 years in this world, yet even with the few more remaining more moments perhaps I won't even get a hint of what is it all about. But I do know this, once you're considered as my friend, you're something that I will always treasure in my heart, and I will never forsake it ever again
No matter what I might say, no matter what mistakes I might do, no matter what will happen...
Boleh aku tanya something tak?
Hah, tanya jela
What is uhh...
Erm, what do you really feel about me?
...As a friend, of course
A... friend ehh?
Haha, its nothing lahh~! So like, we are friends kan?
Yup, kawan. Heee~
Friends forever aite?