GtH, WtHC, F Results

Salam. I can't believe it. I can't believe it that the numbers was indeed successful in making me feel all so down and miserable. Yeah, I'm miserable at best, cause I can't freaking control my own emotion... I still can't find the answer that I've been looking all this while, even if I still didn't try hard enough yet

Maybe my existence was a mistake after all, as I had feared before ~

It gets more and more unbearable by each seconds, minutes and hours passing. And giving up seems more and more like the only option in life...

Oh well, I'll be off now. No need for goodbyes, perhaps I'll be back soon

Menunggu cahaya-cahaya pulang ke rumah...


Salam. Somebody's coming home, here, in fact more than one person, four of them. And I believe two of them are reading my blog currently haha

Let us be free then. Throw away everything else, stand for your own right, enjoy the bit of time you have now. Let them judge us later, let them condemn us later, for all that bittersweet number can do but bring our spirits down. Go to you-know-where with PMR, SPM, finals, whatever whatever, and say hellooooo, world~

I just found out that our result is going to be announced on 10th of December 2009, 10 pm. I don't care, don't you dare ask me how I fared in my finals. Well, unless you're someone really important to me, or someone that I can trust, then perhaps, I'll let it slip a bit

I really want to leave this blog, but I can't

Menunggu orang adalah sangat-sangat bosan~

I Hate This Feeling

Salam. You know, I hate of having this feeling. I even hate to say that sentence again, of how I hate to have this kind of feeling. And even others are using it too, to explain something of similiar experience for them, whatever, but in effect, makes me hate saying that even more

To have my heart beating so hard when I'm thinking about it, the image of that face flashing before me. To be so restless and can't focus on my driving because of it, and the tendency of my body to just jump repeatedly like a hyper active kid. To be hating her for so ignorantly ignoring me while I was hoping for her to reach out to me...

But no, not this time. It's all for the wrong reason, for the wrong person. That's why I have to say, I hate of having this stupid feeling, no matter how I hate of saying it. So what? So what? So WHAT?

And I still can't let go of the past. How on earth can I even think of trying to move on? Is this some kind of my own body's mechanism to help me get over the pain and the hurt from before?

Bullshit, or bullpucky (to be polite), all of this...

I hate myself. I hate her too. Ihy, but Ily too, is that even possible?

"i'll do anything for you, follow any orders
but my heart is my own
i'll protect what is dearest to me
whatever is the cost..."

Aku balik, depa pi sana. Sesapa pon tak suka jadi lonely tahu tak?


Salam. I at home. I'm at ease, but not my heart. I long to be there again, at Shah Alam...

The same thing that happened the last time at home is now happening again. I can't believe the darn coincidence, it seems as if whenever I'm at home, I tend to be a jerk, a real jerk to people that I care, them that are far away

And my friends, they are no longer here. When I'm away, we all made this plan of going out together and stuff, yet when I'm back at Jitra, they are no longer here. And I'm stuck here, with nowhere to go, no one to talk to

120 or something, faster. I really thought before that the Kancil is the one car for me. But just now, my sister finally trusted me with her car. And the rush of driving something else more powerful, more faster... Now I'm craving for more

120 or something, faster. Then crashhhhh~~~~ What a thrill that will be

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