Gravity

Salam. First of all, I want to say thanks to AJ that through his blog that I came to know of the song Gravity by Sara Bareilles, too bad that I didn't get to hear it earlier. The tunes made me fell in love with it instantly, and the lyrics struck me straight at the heart

Something always brings me back to you

It never takes too long

No matter what I say or do

I still feel you're here 'til the moment I'm gone

You hold me without touch

You keep me without chains

I never wanted anything so much

Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain

Set me free, let me be

I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity

Here I am and I stand so tall

I'm just the way I'm supposed to be

But you're on to me, and all over me

I live here on my knees

As I try to make you see

That you're everything I think I need

Here on the ground

But you're neither friend nor foe

Though I can't seem to let you go

The one thing that I still know

Is that you're keeping me down

You're keeping me down

You're on to me, on to me and all over

Something always brings me back to you

It never takes too long

If you are still reading my blog, which I doubt now, know that I dedicates this song to you. If you are to wish to continue ignoring me, I understand then. After all, I just can't help but being a jerk with you that night, and I deserve all this pain of being without your presence. Guess I should do the same, stop being this jerk that I am by pestering you on Facebook or Myspace or even YM anymore...

I really need to sort myself out. Because of this, I've become real easy to be pissed off and rile. My nephew Umar, came to my house earlier, and since he was sick that day, he was not in the mood much to be much fun, throwing tantrum and screaming a lot. Then, at point he crossed the line where he hit me on my head for ignoring him and I suddenly, deep in thought of her, screamed my head off at him, and told him to go away from me

To my shock, he just stood there, his body turned rigid. But he was covering his head, not looking at me, which is obviously because he is scared. And then he ran crying for my mum, and only then that I realized, that I'm not just a jerk, but something else worse. Being just 3 years old, he forgot what happened then, and thing went on normally. But I won't ever forget that scared expression on his face, and I won't forgive myself for doing such horrible a thing to him

I really need to sort myself up, before I ended up hurting myself again, or worse, hurt others that I care for... It is enough pain that she's no longer there at the end heeding my call...

Aku kisah pasal ko, kisah sangat2 pasal ko...